I'm not sure how to name this post
Because it is full of random thoughts and other stuff. So there, no title. I am too lazy? Let’s see…
When you live on a tiny island on the beach, people often mention « island time », meaning that here everything is mellow, things happen when they do, it might take an hour to get dinner or the boat might be late, but that’s how things are. That’s also the Indonesian way, I think. If no one is dying, why get upset about delays of any kind?
For people who come from the first world and have had stressful jobs for years, every single day, it can be plenty of annoying. It was annoying to me at first, now I am just getting used to it.
Therefore, a few weeks ago I was wondering if I was getting too mellow, too used to the island rythm and the laziness of some days. But then I found out during these last few days that I am not. I still am very on time for work, it annoys me when we get delayed; for stuff that needs to be done, I get it done. My brain can still produce other work, which I keep doing for clients on and off a few hours a week and that is totally non-diving related. I am still fast at it. It’s just harder to get around to get started because well, I could be reading in my hammock or swimming instead. But once I am getting started, it’s fine.
What I am getting better at however, thanks to the island time, or the Indonesian time, or whatever else has changed in my life for the past year and a half, is accepting things, letting stuff go. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying the right way is to accept anything (I have NOT turned into Buddha and reached the mighty wisdom or something, I’m afraid. Still not a hippie, friends, thanks for checking.) and I still strongly believe that the things you cannot accept, you should try to change, with your bare hands if needed.Rage can be very healthy feeling sometimes, at least for me!
Most of the time, I get annoyed when people put on Facebook or wherever else big quotes about the meaning of life, how you should embrace this and that every day, etc Even if sometimes I half agree with it, I can still mumble about it and think it is ridiculous. However over the last few weeks, a couple of these quotes have inspired some thinking (while sitting lazily in my hammock probably or during my daily dose of happiness under water when I stare at fish) so I wrote them down, wondering if I would ever do anything with them. And you know me, I share stuff with my friends, so here:
Love, obviously. That is such a cliche that I am not even go there. The one word that matters to me in this sentence is “gracefully”. Endless debates over the past few weeks with a friend about how to be graceful. Not sad or angry or jealous or disappointed when things don’t turn out the way you expected, when people or events disappoint you and leave bitterness in your mouth, when plans don’t come along as planned (because plans are meant to be changed, of course). Maybe it is for a good reason, maybe right now you don’t but eventually you will see why this was not meant for you.
Trying to be graceful is not always easy, but it makes the letting go part easier, I find. And also it makes you graceful. There is nothing wrong with being graceful, it’s kind of chic. And it saves a lot of otherwise wasted energy being all these other things like angry and sad. So you can go surf, for example (or take care of your garden, whatever).
So if they wander away (or right now if I do), so be it. Whether you are thinking about family, old friends, new friends, old loves or new ones, or some recipient of your affection that cannot be defined just yet. Because if really you are meant to cross paths again, one of you (or both) will make the crossroad happen. Sometimes on the crossroad you might realize it was not a great idea, and once again so be it. Because those few friends that have been part of your life for years and are a part of you will be there, no matter what. Because I know that for some of them I would get on plane tomorrow and fly across the world to be on their side shall the need arise, no matter what.
So in the end, once again, it’s about letting go. Accepting that being away, you are far away. Accepting that people will come and go. Accepting that you may not know when you will see some of them again. But in a way, if you are convinced that you will eventually, it makes it easier. The power of your own brain…
Enough of big words now. Just so this post is not completely useless, let's move to a totally different subject.
I would like to introduce you to an amazing website (for the English speaking readers of this wonderful blog). Here are the material to the classes of the famous MIT, for FREE. Free quality stuff is not easy to find. If you have brain cells available and you don’t know what to do with them, why don’t read about “Women and contemporary literature” or “Atmosphere, Ocean and Climate Dynamics”. OK, it might not be the same than being in an actual classroom at MIT and getting grades for the assignment, but this is all free and available for you to get. How nice of me to think of your brain uh? On this clever note, happy weekend to all.