This one is for Carey
Last week, my friend Carey passed away after losing her battle against cancer. I knew this was coming, but obviously that doesn’t make it ok. I remembered about all the fun times below and then I started writing them down for myself and then I thought maybe it would make some of her friends smile too. And I guess since writing is one of the things I do, this is my way of honoring her.
Carey was brave (in a quite unusual way because years ago when we used to hang out, people seemed to think she was that little shy terrified thing when she was already super brave about a bunch of things despite us being very young still) and so she gave time and energy in the last couple of months to raise money for research for osteosarcoma (and like most of you I had no idea what that was until recently), so once again here is the link: you can DONATE HERE. I know I have posted this several times before but I would really appreciate it, because it meant something to Carey and I am sure it does too to her family, partner and friends left behind with a heavy heart.
I met Carey when I was studying in London, it was one of these random things that happens for no good reason and you are grateful that it did. We met on a spring Sunday morning over tea after both spending the night in a house that wasn’t ours because of some boys and it was awkward for 5 minutes and then we became friends. We shared a lot of music, nail polish and giggles over the next couple of years. I remember making her taste avocado for the first time. I remember walking around London forever until we found the perfect pair of red shoes. I remember when she left to live in Glasgow and when I visited and she had to translate for me half of what people were saying, and it was so cold and rainy but we had fun nevertheless and she couldn’t believe I never knew about deep-fried Mars bars before. I remember sitting around in pubs a lot and playing darts, I remember a lot of concerts in a lot of pubs and a lot of train rides over London. I remember at that time it seemed that we had stuff to worry about but really when you are 20 you don’t realise how you have seen nothing yet, and 15 years down the line I know better.
Then I moved back to Paris for a while and I watched her grow from a distance through emails and unfrequent visits, watched her join Camera Obscura and do music. It’s funny how when one of your friends is in a band that’s famous it doesn’t matter if you don’t talk for a while because you get records and interviews and articles and so you feel you hear from them.
I remember being on a plane from NYC to Paris a few years ago and reading an article in a magazine where some famous actress mentioned Camera Obscura in her playlist and taking a pic to send to Carey saying “Look! In America!”. I remember missing a gig of Camera Obscura and a good catch up in Paris for stupid reasons, and I promised I would make the next one and it never came. I remember listening to “My Maudlin Career” so many times that some lyrics of “Honey in the sun” ended up in that book I wrote and I forgot to tell her and now it’s too late and I feel sorry that I didn’t.
In a message Carey sent me a couple of months ago she wrote something along the lines of “I love you for following your heart and being happy living like a hippie on the beach diving every day”, and I guess today is proof again that life is too short to waste it doing anything but something that you enjoy or not feeling that you have enough happiness to fulfill your life.
This last few days, as a weird consequence I guess, I sent some loving messages to people that I love and that I miss. You should do that, or go home and hug your loved ones just because you can.
Carey probably just whispered something funny and we are therefore giggling. I am guessing this is circa 2000.